


The Falsehoods of Erotica

by TheEeveeTamer



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Awkward Conversations, Blow Jobs, Failed Attempt at Sex, First Time, Implied Ryoumarx, M/M, Mentions of exhibitionism, Nerds Being Failures At Sex, Oral Sex, Pillow Talk, Sex Education, Then Actual Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-30 05:32:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6410800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEeveeTamer/pseuds/TheEeveeTamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Getting “The Talk” from your older brother—who was practically your second father—while sitting next to your significant other was definitely in Takumi’s top fives of 'things-I-never-want-to-experience'."</p><p>Wherein Leo and Takumi admit they have no idea what they’re doing, and they reluctantly seek Ryoma and Xander’s help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Falsehoods of Erotica

**Author's Note:**

> I'm. So. Sorry.

“Ow! Shit, fuck, Leo! _Stop!”_

Leo sighed deeply and stopped moving.

“This isn’t working, is it.” It wasn’t really a question, but Takumi felt the need to respond anyways.

“Gee, ya think?!”  He sniffed and wiped his tear-streaked face with the back of his hand.

Leo propped his bare back up against the headboard of their bed and drew Takumi’s form into his arms.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry you know,” Leo kissed Takumi and wiped the dampness from his cheeks with his thumbs. Leo had expected their first attempt at sex to be awkward, but he hadn’t foreseen how… painful it would be. He had barely gotten the tip into Takumi before his companion began tearing up and breaking the skin of his back with is finger nails.

Maybe taking sex advice from the erotic section of the library had been a bad idea.

“Leo?” Takumi meekly mumbled.

“Yes?” Leo raised an eyebrow. Timid was not a word he usually associated with Takumi.

“I think it’s time we admit that we have no clue what we’re doing,”

“What good will that do?” He groaned, “It’s not like there are instructional manuals on this, and obviously the books we’ve been reading aren’t doing us any favors.”

“We could always ask—“

“No. No absolutely not.” Leo cut Takumi off. There was only one thing he hated more than admitting he didn’t know how to do something, and that was needing to ask for help. Especially when that _something_ was having sex.

Takumi defiantly pouted, “Look, I don’t like this any more than you do okay? I’m willing to swallow my pride if you are, but only because I don’t know how much ‘experimentation’ I’m willing to go through.”

Leo sighed as he absentmindedly toyed with a strand of Takumi’s hair, “Fine. You talk to Ryoma and I’ll talk to Xander.”

* * *

The next day the two decided to split up and seek out their brothers individually. Takumi approached Ryoma and took a deep breath to steady himself.

“Ah Takumi! What can I do for you?” Ryoma asked as Takumi uncomfortably shuffled over to him.

“I… uh… could use your advice about something…” Takumi mumbled.

Ryoma took a long look at his little brother. He could feel the awkwardness rolling off of Takumi in waves, and his face broke out into a huge grin.

“I see. I knew this day would come, but honestly I had assumed it would be much sooner!” Ryoma laughed and clapped Takumi on the back.

Takumi could feel the heat rising to his cheeks. He really didn’t need to be reminded that—at the age of eighteen no less—he was definitely a late bloomer when it came to intimacy. Ryoma led them to a less used area of the castle and ushered Takumi into an empty guest room.

Or, well, what would have been an empty guest room had two blonde males not already been occupying it.

Ryoma and Xander glanced at each other and nodded in understanding.

“I see we have a similar problem on our hands,” Xander noted, slightly inclining his head toward an abnormally red-faced Leo, who was currently doing his best to avoid all eye contact.

“Indeed we do,” Ryoma responded. Takumi looked like he was about ready to melt into the floor. Or bolt out of the room. Or both.

“You know this was a bad idea I’m just going to leave now…” Takumi turned around, but he was stopped by a firm hand on his shoulder.

“Stop. Sit.” Ryoma pointed at the bed with his thumb. Xander pulled up two chairs for himself and Ryoma.

Takumi trudged over and sat down beside Leo on the bed, careful to make sure their bodies didn’t touch at all. Getting “The Talk” from your older brother—who was practically your second father—while sitting next to your significant other was definitely in Takumi’s top fives of “things-I-never-want-to-experience”.

“Stay right there,” Ryoma told them, “Xander and I will be right back.”

The door clicked shut behind the two older males.

“I told you this was a bad idea,” Leo smirked at Takumi. Somehow, the effect of the usually smug look was ruined by the red color rapidly overtaking his entire face.

“I didn’t think they’d gang up on us!” Takumi shouted back, “Don’t make me punch that conceited look off of your face.”

Leo frowned and turned up his nose, “I’m sure this will all be over soon and we can both begin burying our shame.”

Takumi let out a strangled noise and fell backwards onto the bed. The two sat in silence until they heard the door open once more.

The two younger males looked on in horror as Xander dropped a small bag full of mystery items on the room’s desk.

* * *

The next ten minutes or so consisted of an awkward stare off between the two sets of men. Takumi’s eyes nervously skirted around the room, and he could feel his entire face heating up under his older brother’s harsh scrutiny. Leo attempted to look casual, but his normally stoic façade was betrayed by the nervous rhythm his fingers tapped out on his knee.

“So when were you planning on telling us?” Xander unexpectedly broke the silence.

Takumi’s head snapped up and quickly glanced between Leo and their older brothers.

 “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Could you elaborate?” Leo responded coolly.

Ryoma waved a hand between the two boys, “This. The two of you. We _are_ aware of the exact nature of your relationship.”

“How did you know?” Takumi blurted out. Leo shot him a glare, “What? They obviously know!”

The two older siblings laughed as Leo’s face turned two shades darker and he turned his head away.

Ryoma took a moment to compose himself, “Everyone knows. You guys are anything but subtle!”

“Leo even ties one of your hair ribbons around his wrist before battles. Really, I cannot believe you expected people not to notice. Now if you could please just admit it,” Xander continued, “then Elise can stop babbling about how adorable the wedding is going to be.”

“And Hinoka will stop talking about how ‘they need to just fuck already’” Ryoma added, “Which, incidentally, is what you two are here to talk to us about, is it not?”

“Okay, okay, fine. Takumi and I are ‘courting’ if you will.” Leo admitted, putting air quotes around the word “courting” and glanced over at Takumi whose face had reddened to match his. “God forbid we try to avoid making a spectacle of ourselves, unlike the two of you. Now, can we please just get on with this?”

Now all four men were flushed with embarrassment. Despite how much Ryoma and Xander wanted to help their little brothers, they both had to admit this was not the type of conversation they eagerly looked forward to having. Xander reached into the bag on the desk and removed a bottle.

“This is lubricant,” He stated bluntly, “Did you use any of this on your first attempt?”

Ah, and thus began the abrupt transition into “The Talk”. Takumi briefly marveled at Xander’s ability to sound so serious while his face was turning so many varieties of red and pink.

“What makes you think we’ve tried anything yet?” Leo demanded indignantly.

“Leo. You and I both know you would not have approached us unless you tried it yourself first and failed.” Xander responded.

“We used some…” Both of the younger males could slowly feel their brains shutting down from embarrassment.

“Did it hurt?” Ryoma bluntly asked.

Takumi hid his face in his hands and prayed that he would suddenly learn to become one with the floor. Leo’s gaze resolutely remained downward, but his face was redder than the tomatoes he loved.

“Then you didn’t use enough,” Xander placed the bottle on the desk.

 “How exactly did you become so knowledgeable about this?” Leo defensively probed.

Ryoma and Xander glanced over at each other. Ryoma gave a sheepish smirk in response, and Xander visibly winced.

“Experience.” They both said in unison.

Despite his mortification Leo smirked and filed that information away for later use.

“Moving on,” Xander pulled another implement out of the bag, “this is a butt-plug. It might be a good idea to progressively use larger sized ones before you attempt actual intercourse.”

A muffled sound came from behind Takumi’s hands.

“What was that Takumi? If you have a question then you need to speak up.” Ryoma scolded him like a particularly strict instructor.

“I said,” Takumi uncovered his face, “’Are we really going to go through everything in that bag?’”

Ryoma enthusiastically nodded, “Everything in that bag and more! No little brother of mine is going into sex unprepared!”

Takumi and Leo groaned in unison.

* * *

It was late into the night when the two were finally allowed return to their room.

“I can’t believe how overzealous they got!” Takumi’s exasperated sigh suddenly filled the room. He flopped backwards onto their bed.

“I can’t believe they gave us _homework!_ ” Leo sat on the edge of the bed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I really did not need to know about the variety of toys they use.”

“We were so ignorant,” Takumi blankly stared up at the ceiling, “I feel as if the entire world has suddenly opened up to me.”

Leo lay down on his side and faced Takumi, “Yeah, they sure don’t teach you any of _that_ in the books.”

Takumi glanced over at Leo when he heard the rustling of papers beside him. True to form, Leo had begun taking notes once the initial embarrassment had worn off. Detailed notes. With diagrams.

“How about we try this one first?” Leo turned the notebook to face Takumi and pointed at a particular diagram. Takumi vaguely recalls it being called ‘cowgirl’ position and that it was supposedly good for first timers.

“Leo, please,” Takumi rolled his eyes, “It’s practically midnight, and I expect you to at least make me dinner first.”

Leo propped himself up on the headboard and skimmed another section of his notes, “I promise I’ll make you miso soup later?”

“Tempting, but I’m not a cheap prostitute,” Takumi sat back up and began undoing his hair ribbons. Silence reigned in the room for a few, blissful minutes.

“So when are you going to admit that this entire experience turned you on?”

Takumi whipped his head around to glare at Leo, “As soon as you stop being an asshole. So, probably never.”

Leo chuckled and pulled Takumi into his arms. Despite the harsh response Leo could tell that Takumi was desperately fighting the blush rising to his cheeks. He rested his chin on Takumi’s shoulder. The other male defiantly turned his head away from Leo’s.

“Quite the little exhibitionist I’ve got on my hands here,” He purred into Takumi’s ear. He brought one of his hands down to rest on Takumi’s abdomen. Takumi squirmed in his arms, but ultimately stayed silent. “Too bad though, I’ll never give anyone else the opportunity of watching you writhe in pleasure,” He nipped lightly at the exposed flesh of Takumi’s jawline. His hand slipped beneath the waist of Takumi’s pants and his slender fingers teasingly stroked Takumi’s already hard cock.

“ _Fuck,_ ” Takumi moaned, “just take me now.”

They both registered that Takumi had just used one of the cheesy lines from those erotica novels, but neither said anything about it. Takumi didn’t point it out because he hoped Leo wouldn’t notice; Leo, because he decided it would be better to tease Takumi with it later.

Leo quickly flipped their positions so that Takumi was on his back and he settled himself between Takumi’s legs. The now loose silver strands of Takumi’s hair fanned out behind his head, and Leo took a moment to absorb the sight of his lover beneath him, face flushed and mouth parted slightly in anticipation.

“The hell are you looking at?”

Leo grinned. He rested his forearms on either side of Takumi’s head and kissed the shorter male.

“You. You’re quite pretty, you know.”

“Um… thanks, but… _ah!_ ” Takumi suddenly moaned. Both male’s eyes shot wide open and Takumi covered his mouth with both hands. “You’re, uh, you’re pulling my hair…”

Leo gazed wide eyed at the hair and wrapped his fingers around a lock. He gave an experimental tug and Takumi involuntarily moaned again.

“Oh the possibilities…” Leo twirled the strands around his finger.

“Is this actually going anywhere, or are you just going to yank at my hair all night?”

Leo ground their hips together once. Takumi bit his lip and whimpered.

“You know what the most unfortunate part of this conversation is?” Leo coyly asked.

“What?”

“The fact that we’re both still fully clothed”

Takumi looked like he was going to reply, but Leo cut him off by quickly pulling Takumi’s shirt over his head and throwing it to the ground. He leaned back in and began trailing kisses down Takumi’s neck and chest until he reached his waist. He sunk his teeth into the jut of Takumi’s hipbone before pulling the rest of Takumi’s clothes off.

“Leo what are you doi- _ah!_ ” Takumi’s back arched and the back of his head pushed against the pillows beneath him. Leo had his lips wrapped around the head of his cock, and he was slowly working the rest of it into his mouth. Takumi reached forward and gripped Leo’s hair in an attempt to anchor himself. He could also feel Leo’s gaze searing into him as he whimpered in pleasure.

Leo had to admit that Takumi looked positively _erotic_ like this, and that just the sight of his lover was a complete turn on. He continued his ministrations until he felt Takumi’s fingers grip his hair so tightly that it was almost painful. He withdrew his mouth and sat up, eliciting a frustrated groan from Takumi. He wiped the trail of saliva off the corner of his own mouth with his shirt sleeve.

“You bastard,” Takumi growled as his hips bucked, seeking more of that lost friction.

Leo gripped the hand that Takumi edged downwards to finish himself off. He kissed the inside of Takumi’s wrist, “Now, now. Let’s not be hasty here.”

“Then get on with it!” Takumi admonished.

The taller male chuckled and began undressing himself. “Okay, but no crying this time.”

Takumi glared at the spot just over Leo’s shoulder, “It’s not _my_ fault you had no idea how sex worked!”

“As I recall, neither did you?” Leo squeezed some lubricant onto his fingers and began teasing Takumi’s entrance open.

“Yeah but—“ He flinched slightly as Leo inserted a finger, “—You’re not the one getting a dick shoved up your ass.”

“Relax,” Another finger went in once Takumi was comfortable with the first, “We actually know what we’re doing this time.”

Leo worked his fingers until Takumi felt stretched out enough beneath him.

“Ready yet?” He asked.

“As ready as I can be, I guess,” Takumi responded, “let’s just get the hard part over with.”

Leo retracted his fingers and squeezed more of the lubricant onto his hand to rub on himself.

 “I don’t think you need to use half the bottle,” Takumi taunted.

“Do you really want a repeat of last night?” Leo shot back.

Takumi winced. “Point taken.”

Leo repositioned their bodies so that Takumi’s ankles were locked at the small of Leo’s back, and Leo’s swollen member was pressing at Takumi’s entrance.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Leo belatedly inquired.

“I think if I really wanted to stop this I would have done it somewhere between the blowjob and the fingering,” Takumi rolled his eyes.

“Just tell me to stop if it hurts too much, okay?”

“Leo, I’m not made of glass!” Takumi snapped.

Leo leaned down and kissed Takumi quickly on the lips, “I know, I’m sorry.”

Leo slowly pushed into Takumi, stopping each time the other’s face started to look too pained, until he was fully sheathed within him.

“Are you okay?” Leo fretted, seeing Takumi’s brows knitted together and eyes squeezed shut. At least he wasn’t crying yet.

“I feel like you’re tearing me in half.” Takumi ground out.

“Should we stop?”

“No.” He sighed, “No, just give me a minute.”

During the interim Leo showered Takumi’s face with apologetic kisses. Slowly Takumi’s jaw slackened and his nails stopped digging into Leo’s bare back so mercilessly.

“Okay,” Takumi nodded beneath him

Leo began setting a pace for them. Slow, shallow thrusts soon turned frenzied as Takumi adjusted to the sensations. Leo leaned in and locked his lips with Takumi’s. One hand reached between their panting bodies and erratically stroked Takumi’s neglected member. Soon Leo’s mouth was trailing down Takumi’s jawline and neck. He aggressively bit down at the junction of Takumi’s collarbone and neck.

“Wh-What are you d-doing?” Takumi stuttered out.

“Just staking my claim,” Leo growled possessively. He renewed his assault on Takumi’s neck and face, his hand continuing its attentions until Takumi threw his head back and came all over his chest. The sight of Takumi bowed in ecstasy soon had Leo following, shooting his seed deep inside of his partner.

Leo rolled off of Takumi and attempted to slow his labored breathing. He turned his head and was met with the sight of Takumi, just as out of breath and sweaty as he was—though significantly more messy—basking in the afterglow.

“Leo?” Takumi finally broke the silence, once the air started entering his lungs with a bit more consistency.

“Yeah?”

“Those books fucking lied.” He glared over at the stack of books on their end table.

He rolled over to face Takumi, “How so?”

“Well, I most certainly didn’t feel like ‘a lost piece of me had finally returned’, I was not ‘seeing magical pleasure stars’, and I most certainly did not feel ‘rabidly lost to feelings of lust’” Takumi followed suit and turned to face Leo.

“So what did you feel then?” Leo absentmindedly tucked a few strands of loose hair behind his partner’s ear.

“I felt like there was a dick being shoved up my ass.” He deadpanned.

“I’m guessing by your moans that it wasn’t a wholly unpleasant sensation?” Leo grinned that stupid, self-satisfied smirk again.

 “I’m going to take a bath.” He let out a sigh and rolled out of bed. A few steps later Takumi visibly winced and exhaled a barely audible “Ugh!”

“Something the matter?” Leo had shifted himself to the other side of the bed, intending to follow Takumi’s lead and take a long soak in the bathtub with his companion.

“It’s… It’s not supposed to be seeping out like that, is it?” Leo lowered his gaze and laughed when he realized exactly what Takumi was referring to.

“I’m flattered that you assumed my cum would be special enough to defy gravity,” Leo joked. There was something inexplicably sexy about seeing the result of their love-making in the way Takumi awkwardly wobbled to the bathroom and the in the sight of his semen running down his lover’s inner thigh. Not to mention the sizeable hickey that Takumi would be sporting on his neck by the morning.

Takumi snorted and crossed his arms, “Do something useful and grab the towels while I run the bath.”

By the time Leo had gathered up all of the necessary items Takumi was already sitting in the half-full tub and attempting to scrub himself clean—without the aid of the washcloth he had sent Leo to get, of course. Wordlessly, Leo joined Takumi and helped scrub the both of them clean of the night’s activities.

“So, now we’ve established that you’re a submissive exhibitionist with a hair fetish,” Leo wrapped his arms around Takumi and pulled him back so that he was resting against Leo’s chest, “got anything else you’d like to try?”

“Oh shut up. Like you don’t have any fetishes,” Takumi huffed, but he still rested his arms over Leo’s and leaned into his partner’s chest.

“Of course I do!” Leo gazed at him with mock seriousness, “I get off when you get off, baby.”

The intense stare held for a minute before both males burst into laughter.

“Which terrible book did you get that one from?”

“Can’t remember, we read so many of them.”

Takumi nudged him and laughed, “Seriously, what does the great Leo get off to?”

“Well… I have this one fantasy. It involves you bent naked over the war table with your hands tied behind your back, and your cheek is forced against the wood as I take you from behind. People are watching us, and you’re embarrassed but you can’t bring yourself to do anything but _beg_ for it. Only, despite how prettily you plead, I keep you nice and sexually frustrated after I’ve finished so everyone can see exactly how needy you are for my cock.” Leo paused, his arms tightened around Takumi protectively, “Of course it’s just a fantasy, I don’t think I could handle anyone seeing you like that in reality.”

Takumi’s face turned a furious shade of red, “O-oh…”

“Too honest?”

“No it’s just… I may have a similar fantasy,” Takumi replied quickly.

“Seriously?”

Takumi nodded in response, “Only we’re on a throne, and I’m riding you.”

For whatever reason it had never dawned on either male that—like their interests and preferences—their sexual fetishes would align so well.

Leo leaned forward and kissed Takumi’s temple, “Damn I love you,”

Takumi absolutely beamed back at him—one of those rare all-out smiles of his—and turned his body so he could kiss Leo’s lips.

“I love you too, ya arrogant ass.”

**Author's Note:**

> I completely headcanon that Leo ties one of Takumi's hair ribbons around his wrists before battles. No idea why, I just think the idea is adorable.
> 
> Anyways, hope you enjoyed!


End file.
